The Talos Principle

I think this is probably a game that everyone should play. I don't believe any other piece of media has ever caused me to more deeply analyze and reassess my beliefs and assumptions. I've emerged from this game with a fresh perspective.
A week later, I am still thinking about this experience, and feel compelled to write this review.

A world of questions, philosophy, challenges and meaning, or lack of it. Knowledge is some kind of freedom, but here you'll have to think a lot to deserve it, if you do want it, of course.
And while god tries to convince me he's useful, I learn that even the most loyal philosopher can't live without his blood. These words could be mine or not, but others have done these choices before me, and I hope I have learned from their mistakes and be able to build on their success. Because to deserve success in the Talos Principle you seriously have to use your brain. The first half of the game has pretty easy puzzles but the second part becomes seriously hard. And even if basically everything is a metaphor of a simulation of something that doesn't exist, it's impossible to deny the charm of this alluring and complex game.

For over half a decade The Talos Principle sat in my library unplayed.
A cult classic I knew I should play but never did, until recently.
I won't dive deep into spoilers because it's best played blindly.
It is a puzzle game with a thought provoking story and world to back it up.
Puzzles are in theory simple but in practice complex, the game has a strict toolbox of items yet constantly pushes you to creatively break the rules.
While most puzzles are excellent it is the incredible story and world that will stick with you after you finish this game.
The Talos Principle is gaming’s best kept secret and this is your sign to finally play it!

---{ Graphics }---
☐ You forget what reality is
☑ Beautiful
☐ Good
☐ Decent
☐ Bad
☐ Don‘t look too long at it
☐ MS-DOS

---{ Gameplay }---
☑ Very good
☐ Good
☐ It's just gameplay
☐ Mehh
☐ Watch paint dry instead
☐ Just don't

---{ Audio }---
☑ Eargasm
☐ Very good
☐ Good
☐ Not too bad
☐ Bad
☐ I'm now deaf

---{ Audience }---
☐ Kids
☑ Teens
☑ Adults
☐ Grandma

---{ PC Requirements }---
☐ Check if you can run paint
☐ Potato
☑ Decent
☐ Fast
☐ Rich boi
☐ Ask NASA if they have a spare computer

---{ Game Size }---
☐ Floppy Disk
☐ Old Fashioned
☑ Workable
☐ Big
☐ Will eat 15% of your 1TB hard drive
☐ You will want an entire hard drive to hold it
☐ You will need to invest in a black hole to hold all the data

---{ Difficulty }---
☐ Just press 'W'
☐ Easy
☐ Easy to learn / Hard to master
☐ Significant brain usage
☑ Difficult
☐ Dark Souls

---{ Grind }---
☐ Nothing to grind
☐ Only if u care about leaderboards/ranks
☐ Isn't necessary to progress
☑ Average grind level
☐ Too much grind
☐ You'll need a second life for grinding

---{ Story }---
☐ No Story
☐ Some lore
☐ Average
☐ Good
☑ Lovely
☐ It'll replace your life

---{ Game Time }---
☐ Long enough for a cup of coffee
☐ Short
☐ Average
☑ Long
☐ To infinity and beyond

---{ Price }---
☐ It's free!
☑ Worth the price
☐ If it's on sale
☐ If u have some spare money left
☐ Not recommended
☐ You could also just burn your money

---{ Bugs }---
☐ Never heard of
☑ Minor bugs
☐ Can get annoying
☐ ARK: Survival Evolved
☐ The game itself is a big terrarium for bugs

---{ ? / 10 }---
☐ 1
☐ 2
☐ 3
☐ 4
☐ 5
☐ 6
☐ 7
☐ 8
☐ 9
☑ 10

Game sat +11 years in my library. Goodness me, what a mistake. It is an absolute gem of a game!

Very good game about consciousness and faith written by a smart ass that forces a Socratic dialogue on you every 15 to 30 minutes

So I finally finished this game, well technically I did. What can I say about it? well The Talos Principle is a really engaging puzzle game and has some neat things to offer for anyone who likes these sorts of puzzle games. Although I would recommend you..
GET THIS GAME ON SALE!
This is a good game worth playing if you're into puzzle solving, however I didn't rush to buy it until it was obviously below 30 bucks. I think I got it at 10 dollars? maybe in 2014 it was worth that much, but the sale is what got me to play it. Besides that, onto the review!
the graphics
This wont be a long section, but the graphics in this game are beautiful. Alot might say its "outdated", I would insist that it looks way better than most games now a days. plus for something that came out in 2014, It holds up really well! Honestly I looked at the remaster and didn't get blown away by the "comparison" anything from this era looked fine. The landscapes are great to look at and there is a variety to the overall world design. ex. snow, desert, forest, etc. The gameplay did slow on me a couple times, but I think that has to do more with how many things are loaded and running throughout the level while playing which brings me to..
the gameplay
When I got the game I sort of already figured out what kind of game it was gonna be, Looked alot like portal. Well its actually sort of similar; a simulation, no real worry about dying, puzzles that make you think. It was basically portal without the portal gun and a philosophy book added to it.
There isn't much of a variety in terms of what the game throws at you, however it flowed with the game fine and each had its own purpose in the puzzle usage. the puzzles themselves were good, basic but also challenging at times. I had fun figuring them out and it was satisfying once you complete one. Some took longer than others, although I never actually used a guide for any of them, usually if its unsolvable you try another time and later on it clicks what you're suppose to do. I was able to solve every puzzle without aggravation or frustration, no puzzle in this game was BS imo . Most puzzles took 5-20 minutes again depending on the player and knowledge of the game, now that I've played it, the game might be much shorter now that every puzzle is easy. It took me at least more than 15 hours to complete the base game, not counting star collecting, and thats with all the taking my time, thinking, and walking around in mind.
the story
not really gonna spoil a more than decade old game, however there are some different endings depending on how you interact with the terminal and game. something so 2010s with the decision making, It was a fun throwback. It was pretty interesting on how the game structured itself with the terminal and player, nothing earth shattering once you remind yourself its just a puzzle game, nonetheless it flowed with the gameplay and kept you wondering what might happen in the end. kind of anticlimactic, however I haven't played the second game so perhaps more "lore" is added. Although it was interesting, I didn't really engage with the story as much as I did with the puzzles.
MINI SPOILER
I don't know if I would even call it that, but with the game being this sort of "simulation" type, I really was expecting something spooky to pop up during gameplay Not really anything, however that one moment where the other robot is screaming and running scared tf out of me, plus the computer head dude freaked me out when he popped up nothing is gonna jump at you, nor is there any real need to be on edge. Theres my stamp of approval
closing thoughts
This game was short, didn't expect it to be really long, but it was enjoyable. I will say though that there isn't really that much to explore. I'm one of those people who will free roam every inch of the area to see if theres anything interesting to interact with and really nothing. AND NO IM NOT COUNTING EASTER EGGS. it was honestly a bit bare bones IMHO, especially for a game from the 2010s, however with the small dev team I didnt expect it to be anything like that. I really thought there would be some sort of replayability to the game, but I guess the DLC and squeakuel do that? I don't think I will play it anytime soon unless im wanting to collect all stars and speedrun the game. now that looks pretty cool to do a few times! The controls were fine, obviously puzzle games dont neeed a whole lot of control. I felt the movement and mechanics to be satisfactory, nothing mind blowing, but good and easy to pick up and play.
Oooh the music, I actually turned off the music early on as a choice I usually do with games because I put background sound or videos to accompany my puzzle solving. So I don't really have any say in the music, however Im pretty sure its fine, It has that puzzle-like music that comes with the atmosphere.
This game Is a good puzzle brain teaser, you really feel on top of the world once you complete all these puzzles knowing each their own nic and nac to it! Now I don't think its a 10/10 game by any stretchh of the meanns not even close. It's a fun puzzle solving game with some mechanics that keep it interesting and create a satisfying feeling once completing a piece.
TLDR; I would say this is a game worth playing once you get a good deal on it, sometimes its even more than 50% off! Don't expect anything "game of the year" type of expectations, however I would rate this game to be a simulating 7/10 and maybe even a 7.5/10 on a good day. Thanks for reading!